每日笑料:内涵冷笑话,十万个为什么

宁波苗医生专业祛痘 2018-08-09 14:47:20

苗医生专业祛痘


美丽说


今日的精彩

自从我牙齿掉光后

A guy goes to visit his grandma and he brings his friend with him. While he's talking to his grandma, his friend starts eating the peanuts on the coffee table, and finishes them off. As they're leaving, his friend says to his grandma, "Thanks for the peanuts." She says, "Yeah, since I lost my dentures I can only suck the chocolate off."  

一名男子带着朋友去探望他的祖母。

当他和祖母聊天时,他的朋友开始吃咖啡桌上放的花生,并把花生都给吃光了。他们离开时,他的朋友对祖母说:"谢谢您的花生。" 结果祖母说:"唉!自从我牙齿掉光后,我就只能吮掉花生豆外层的巧克力了。"


肚里就不会长虫了

A father was trying to teach his son the evils of alcohol. 

He put one worm in a glass of water and another worm in a glass of whiskey. The worm in the 

water lived, while the one in the whiskey curled up and died. 

"All right, son," asked the father, "What does that show you?" 

"Well, Dad, it shows that if you drink alcohol, you will not have worms." 

一位父亲打算让自己的儿子知道酒精有多么可怕。他把分别把两只虫子放到一杯清水和一杯威士忌里做对比。清水里虫子安然无恙,结果威士忌里的虫子蜷缩了几下就挂掉了。"所以,儿子啊,"父亲问道,"得出什么结论?" "恩,这说明,你只要喝酒的话,肚里就不会长虫了!"


以后谁打我我就打谁

我家姑娘前几日报一个跆拳道班,今天跟我说:爸爸我练到黑带以后谁打我我就打谁。

我说:千万不要和小朋友打架。

她说:包括你在内。


我家熊孩子

由于不允许孩子周末在家上网,准备早上上班的时候把无线路由器的电源带走,结果,等我去拿的时候却发现已经被我家熊孩子昨晚就先藏起来了。。。


我保证不告诉他们!

骑电动车载着儿子摔了一跤,我就跟他说回家不要告诉爷爷奶奶我们摔跤了。

儿子说,妈妈我保证不告诉他们!

结果回到楼下我锁车!他上楼就开始喊!奶奶,奶奶刚刚我妈妈骑车带我摔跤了

妈妈还不让我告诉你们!

我……

儿子!说好的保证呢!


十万个为什么

晚上有个乘客简直就是十万个为什么。

问我:师傅,服务卡上是你吗?我说是的。

问我:我看你开车技术很好啊?

我回答:还行吧。

又问我:技术好是因为你以前开过赛车?

我嫌烦干脆也回答是的。

最后他问:喜欢兜圈子是不是开赛车留下的职业病?


刚刚买的一个小型风扇,没想的风竟然这么大,我现在不怕热了。



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