I think that I'm a chicken
Psychiatrist:What's your problem?
Patient:I think I'm a chicken
.Psychiatrist:How long has this been going on?
Patient:Ever since I was an egg!
The mean man's party
The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party.Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment,he said：
"Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow.When the door open,push with your foot."
"Why use my elbow and foot?"
"Well,gosh," was the reply,"You're not coming empty-hangded,are you?