不会讲英语笑话?看看这个吧

口语100网络学习空间 2018-04-13 13:31:29


学习一门外语,自然也要学习外语中的幽默,能懂得笑话里的笑点。今天小编为大家精选出,五则双语笑话,在学习的同时,也能一起笑哈哈。

ONE

An old man lived alone in Northern Ireland. His only son was in prison。The old man wanted to plant some potatoes in his garden, but he didn't know anyone who would help him plow up the garden.

He wrote to his son about it, and received this reply:"For heaven sake, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the guns!"

At 4 AM the next morning, a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden, but didn't find any guns.

Confused, the old man wrote to his son telling him what happenedand asking him what to do next.

His son's reply was: "Just plantyour potatoes."

翻译:

一位老人独居在北爱尔兰,他的独生子正在坐牢。老人想在花园里种些土豆,但不知道谁可以帮忙把泥土翻松。

他写信向儿子提及此事,儿子回信说道:“看在上帝的面上,千万不要翻松花园的泥土,我把枪就埋在那里。”

  第二天凌晨4点,一队英国士兵出现在老人家中,在花园把土地翻遍,但并没有找到任何枪支。

  老人写信告诉儿子这件奇怪的事情,问到底发生了什么,下一步应该怎么做。

  儿子回信道:“你只管种土豆好了。”

 

TWO

One day, a little girl came home from school, and said to her mother:"Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do."

The mother exclaimed:"That's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this! By the way, what was it that you didn't do?"

The little girl replied:"My homework."

翻译:

  一天,小女孩从学校回到家里,对妈妈说:“妈妈,今天我在学校,因为一件我没有做过的事情而受到惩罚。”

  妈妈激动地说:“那真是太可怕了!我要跟你的老师好好谈谈,对了,你没有做过的那件事是什么?”

  小女孩回答说:“我的家庭作业。”


THREE

“All the kids make fun of me” the boy cried to his mother. “They say I have a big head”

“Don't listen to them.” his mother comforted him. “You have a beautiful head .Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes”

“Where's the shopping bag?”

“I haven't got one, use your hat.”

翻译:

“所有的孩子都拿我开玩笑,”小男孩哭着跟妈妈说:“他们说我长了一个大脑袋。”

“别听他们的,”他妈妈安慰说:“你的脑袋长得很漂亮。好了,别哭了,去商店买10磅土豆来。”

“购物袋在哪?”

“我没有购物袋,用你的帽子吧。”


FOUR

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.

"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

"She is the one who sells the candy."

翻译:

   小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

       “昨天给你的钱干什么了?”

“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。

“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太感兴趣?”

“她是个卖糖果的。”


FIVE

A mother mouse was out for a stroll with her babies when she spotted a cat crouched behind abush. She watched the cat, and the cat watched the mice.

Mother mouse barked fiercely:“ Woof,woof, woof!" The cat was so terrified that it ran for its life.

Mother mouse turned to her babies and said: "Now, do you understand the value of a second language?"

翻译:

  一只母老鼠带着孩子出来散步,突然看见一只猫正在灌木丛中虎视眈眈。

  母老鼠向着猫叫道:“汪,汪,汪”。猫非常害怕,拼命跑走了。

  母老鼠回过头洋洋自得地对孩子说:“现在你知道外语的重要性了吧。”

 


 


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