A film crew was on location deep in the desert. One day an old Indian went up to the director and said, "It will rain tomorrow." The next day it rained.
A week later, the Indian went up to the director again and said, "There will be a storm tomorrow." The next day there was a storm.
"This Indian is incredible," said the director. He told his secretary to hire the Indian to predict the weather.
However, after several successful predictions, the old Indian didn't show up for two weeks.
Finally the director sent for him. "I have to shoot an important scene tomorrow," said the director. "And I'm depending on you. What will the weather be like?"
The Indian shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know," he said. "My radio is broken."
While on a trip, Mom realized that she had forgotten a present for Dad's birthday.
"That's okay," he said, "The only thing I want is for you to love, honor and obey."
Mom pondered that idea and then replied "I'd rather buy you a gift."
harry and lloyd were speeding down the road. a police car pulled them over.
"why on earth were you driving so fast?" the policeman yelled.
"our brakes are no good, so we wanted to get there before we had an accident!
There was once a snail who was sick and tired of his reputation for being so slow.
Hedecided to get some fast wheels to make up the difference.
After shopping around a while, he decided that the Datson 240-Z was the car to get.
So the snail goes to the nearest Datsundealer and says he wants to buy the 240-Z, but he wants it repainted "240-S".
The dealer asks, "Why 'S'?"
The snail replies, "'S' stands for snail.
I want everybody who sees me roaring past to know who's driving."
Well, the dealer doesn't want to lose the unique opportunity to sell a car to a snail,
so he agrees to have the car repainted for a small fee.
The snail gets his new car and spent the rest of his days roaring happily down the highway at top speed.
And whenever anyone would see him zooming by, they'd say "Wow! Look at that S-car go!"